The mind is a funny thing – well maybe it’s just my mind but still. It plays tricks on me and its just odd. (my husband says I am odd altogether, so it probably is just be me)
For this Ironman I am nervous. Why I don’t know? I am nervous that I won’t be ready in time, I am nervous that I won’t have trained enough, I am nervous that my nutrition on the day will be wrong. Just plain nervous.
Now why is this odd, well it is my second Ironman and I am WAY better prepared than I was for the last one – and I still have 12 weeks to go!
Last time Ironman, as I was cycling in the race, a spider walked across my bicycle computer and started spinning a web. I kind off laughed to myself and thought I should probably have cycled a bit more if my bike is covered in cobwebs. And the truth was I really should have ridden more. In the race my odometer past the 1000 km mark. That means that all the training I did since the purchase of my bike to the start of the race was less than 1000km! How the heck did I ever make it to the end and enjoy it? On my new bike, which I have only had for 4 weeks I have already done nearly 500km! On my old bike I did nearly 1000km since I started training again – and I still have 12 weeks left!
Even my running has improved quite a bit since the last time. I am faster and stronger and enjoying the training. I am not sure about my swimming, I got in the pool last night and thought I was about to drown. But I think it has improved. I did a 2 km race not so long ago and it went very well. Ok, the conditions were perfect but it was still quicker than I have done it before.
So why am I nervous? My nutrition went well last time, so I am going to repeat that. I thoroughly enjoyed the race last time, so I am hoping to emulate that. I will have trained much more this time and my speeds have improved. Maybe it is because of that reason that I am nervous. I will have put in a lot more work and what if the results aren’t there. I would like to do quite a bit better this year. What if I don’t? What if I don’t enjoy it as much? I feel so much more unprepared this time. I feel like I have not even started training and yet I have actually stuck (mostly) to my program. Maybe this time it just does not feel like training because I am enjoying it? Last time I was tired all the time and this time that exhaustion just has not been there.
Yikes – 12 weeks left.