Posted in Ordinarylife, Pregnancy, Women

Certain people are RUDE!

Well in this case – certain women are rude! 

I went to a friend’s daughter’s first birthday party on Saturday.  Besides being overrun with one year olds it was great.  My friend did a very good job at decorating, snacks etc and I knew some of the people (my brother and his fiancé) so generally had fun. 

My friend, being the great hostess that she is, introduced me to some of the other people there and told them that I was pregnant.  One of the first questions they asked me was “Was it planned”.  Uhm excuse me!!!!!!  The first couple of times I let it slide and just answered yes, but the more I thought about it the more people that asked me the more cross I became.  Firstly – what the heck does it have to do with them and secondly – so what if it was or wasn’t! The outcome is still the same. 

These people knew NOTHING about me. They did not know if I was married (although maybe the ring gave it away), they did not know if I had a history of trying or problems conceiving.  I felt that this question is totally inappropriate!  I spoke to another of my friends and she said she got it a couple of times as well. 

Is this just ANOTHER of those things that you need to get used to when becoming pregnant or a parent.  People think nothing of discussing very personal issues with you even it is none of their business? 

Later that night I could not sleep – I kept thinking of smart replies that I should have come up with.  Here are a few: 

  • UHM – NO, I started having sex when I was about 17, so pretty regularly for the past 20 YEARS, but birth control, jeez – you know that has kind of gotten me stumped!!! 
  • “Was yours?” 
  • Uhm, well I kind of just fell on my husbands willy while I was neekid and this is what happened? 
  • Uhm, not really, I just had a one night stand with your husband and we weren’t planning on telling you – but then as you can see I am not that good at planning…..

 Can you think of any more because I am sure it is going to happen again….

11 thoughts on “Certain people are RUDE!

  1. Yup, get used to it. Wait till you have a large bump and people think nothing of touching it and lifting your top to have a closer look!

    You have been warned!

    I would have said something like – actually this is my 5th IVF or something. That would have shut them up.

  2. I’ve heard that you become public property when you’re pregnant!

    For years after my divorce people like colleagues and distance acquaintances, who hadn’t even known me when I was married, would ask me what went wrong in my marriage and why I got divorced. I thought is was incredibly rude! I never ask personal questions…

    I have no advice for you, but I like your answers!

  3. Tricia – yip, that is probably the one I will go with in the future. I think I would be too embarrased to say the others.

    Shayne – I have already experienced it. URGH!!! I have also realised that I have serious personal space issues. One of the woman at work came up to me and grabbed my tummy. I was totally not expecting it and hit her hand away and yelled “Don’t touch”. One of the girls I worked with had a woman come up to her at a funeral and lift her shirt and start kissing her tummy. I think I would have wacked her on the top of her head out of fright. I think I am going to have to get a “Don’t Touch” Tshirt printed or something.

    Hanlie – It is amazing the questions people ask – so inappropriate. If they were close enough to you that you would want them to know the answer they would not have to ask!!!

  4. People are so strange. I didn’t get any bizarre questions or people touching my belly, but I was overweight and my boobs got huge, so I think I ended up just looking obese. Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise.

    I like your potential responses next time this situation should arise. Man, people are lame.

  5. Never heard that one before, but I have noticed how often people feel the urge to touch a pregnant tummy!

    When I lived in Italy, I was told it is good luck to touch the tummy, but I wouldn’t dare!

  6. How about: “God yes, it was planned. Me and my hubby were going at it hammer and tongs six or eight times a night – he ended up in hospital twice – once with back trouble, the other time with… well… I won’t go into details, but we had to use a turkey baster for a fortnight, anyway fortunately he got back to his best pretty quickly thanks to Graham the massage therapist, who was ever so kind and helpful, and then it just took another couple of months and then we got the good news that I was pregnant – of course we didn’t really believe it at first, so we carried on for a few weeks “just incase” – well, you never know with modern tests these days, do you – but yes, now I’m getting all fat and I’m so looking forward to having droopy tits just like you.”

    Anyway – now I’ve given you a suitable answer for next time, you can tell us – was it planned?

  7. Kirsten – it probably was a blessing.

    Lynette – I will probably still be to shocked to use then next time too.

    FF – good one, I am going to write that to my list

    Del – not good luck if they try and touch mine. I did not think I was a violent person but……

    6000 – “God yes, it was planned. Me and my……….. (I am sure you know the rest of the story).

    Charisa – I really don’t know.

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